First of all, Hypothetical Reader, I’d like to apologise. I have failed. I’ve failed you, I’ve failed WordPress, I’ve failed the readers but most importantly Hypothetical Reader, I’ve failed myself. For which I am ashamed. Kind of.
I have succumb to laziness and lack of discipline. The purpose of this blog is to write a post every day no matter what. I even set myself the allowance of just posting a picture or a quote. I even allowed myself to post just a word. One. Measly. Single. Word. And I couldn’t even do that. But I have my excuses . . .
- I was visiting family that I only get to see a few times every year. Family members that are richer and more worthy than I am. This meant for the majority of the weekend I was full of steak and red wine and, consequently, not feeling at my most productive.
- The internet literally didn’t work for 69% of the time I was there (honestly, I worked it out). And for the remaining 31% of the time it ran at such a slow speed that loading the Google homepage was the equivalent of cleaning the bathroom floor with a toothbrush.
- I went to plug my laptop in and the adapter blew up in my face. Although providing a brief moment of excitement to my otherwise uneventful life, this meant that my battery would inevitably run out, meaning I’d might as well have entered a time warp back to 1998.
- I did actually write out a suitable post but, and you won’t believe this Hypothetical Reader, I left it lying around and the dog ate it. I know, right? Bloody typical.
But now I have no more excuses. I’m back where I belong. I have a working computer, working internet and a fridge only a quarter full with cheap food that’s got to last me until next month. So, not likely to feel full and unproductive anytime soon.
I realise this post is a bit lacking and poor. But I felt I just needed to write a quick excuse; if not for anyone who actually gives a shit, then for continuity.
Toodle-doo . . .